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                      the freedom to …

                I expect vindication at school
                      and experience only defeat
                I expect the play of creativity when I write
                      and experience only a faltering pen
                I expect to event my own horizon when I sit
                      and experience only a sleeping leg
                I expect beauty and resolve when I am living
                      and experience only foreclosure

                      there is
                so much to relinquish –

                will be ignored you
                will be overlooked you
                will be patronised even when being told you are not you
                will be ridiculed

                you will not be clever enough
                      to compel
                you will not be charismatic enough
                      to glamour
                you will not be earnest enough
                      to influence
                you will not be essential enough
                      to envision

                      … enjoy
                enjoy yourself acting and feeling and influencing
                with no hope with no ends with no respite





being wormhole: meditation session
doing wormhole: the empty page
letting go wormhole: from lost / to open
talking to myself wormhole: … satisfaction