Tags
2013, 5*, ageing, anxiety, being, Christmas, coffee shop, identity, life, music, talking to myself, time, voices, windows
yet another sprain
of ‘Jingle Bells’ straining
to propagate yet another
tired Christmas spirit – …
‘sanner clawsis coming t’ taunn – yeah’ in a
coffee shop with condensation
running off the snowflake transfers
and the iphone at the next table
talking how 50 means 900 a month – not worth
the drive (left his scarf behind –
collateral) … about my age
in my fifties I come to realise
how little I am what I wanted to be
all along
how much I have missed what I was while
I strived to be something else
how anxious all the while that I wasn’t
existing
can nobody hear me?
————w(O)rmholes________________________________|—–
anxiety wormhole: Plumstead – Woolwich 121114
being & talking to myself wormhole: ‘hello old friend …’
Christmas wormhole: letters to Mum V – carrying on in duty and love
coffee shop wormhole: there are patient listeners
identity wormhole: tong // len
life & music wormhole: I need to keep my eyes open / in meditation
time wormhole: Dr Strange IV – ellipses
voices wormhole: – sigh! –
windows wormhole: glass
Please know fine poet that I always hear your fine poetry.
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thank you, Bonnie
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We’re not dead yet, M. Perhaps we have been given the gift of renovation in our fifties – not abandoning our youthful ideals entirely, but realizing that we now possess the wisdom to play the hand that’s been dealt and still win the game.
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… I’m becoming easy with the fact that I AM getting older – right on the cusp, in fact – and not resisting it like I used to; and I find that I am regaining my child when – at great and long-lasting pains – I also see that the game being played all along wasn’t that good; I can play my hand, now, because I have a far better game to play riht down the line: not playing the game that I used to and which still tempts me in a thousand different (but receding) ways; I am devolving into a hippy and loving it (// I am growing my hair long even though I have been balding for the last two & a half decades); weeeeee
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I was a hippie, then went corporate, and have now come full circle, thank the Cosmos. I like this new game better, too. Let your freak flag fly, M, balding be damned! 😉
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but never forget – as your gravatar suggests – there is no hippie without corporate to define itself from; there is no corporate (that can last) without value – wherever your puddy feet may stray … (thing is, too, I was just too young to be a hippie during the time (60s) now I’m too old to care!)
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