dear Lucy

Tags

2014, 3*, attention, face, heart, identity, letter, notice, self-indulgent, sitting, smile, therapy, walking

                dear Lucy

I would like to order some more of that mixture you made for me
could I have a bigger bottle

I think I’m noticing I walk about
with a slight smile in my heart

(although it easily turns to a grimace when I try to ‘put’ myself into the groove
and find myself not being there)

I think I slip some of those things that snag, or even when ‘snagged’ I don’t
dangle and I certainly won’t add to the soap-script

my sitting is no better, I still teeter all around ‘just’ sitting
but I think I am cusping

 

 

 

^{————w}(O)rmholes_________________________________|—–

attention wormhole: make your rickety / constructs strong with / unbending grids / of attention and wide- / open grates of let
identity wormhole: this time
sitting wormhole: tragic and archival
smile wormhole: bud
walking wormhole: and I lose sight of her into memory

 

just

Tags

2014, 3*, boundary, dusk, eyes, film, freedom, horse, looking, meadow, morning, mountains, waiting

                just

                                crouching
                from mid-morning until gathering dusk
                                not moving
                                                drying
looking deep across the meadow with no boundaries but the mountains
                into the horse’s eyes who
                                just doesn’t
                                                run
                                                free

 

film: ‘The Horse Whisperer’, 1998

 

 

^{————w}(O)rmholes_________________________________|—–

eyes wormhole: free
film wormhole: divergent // direction
looking wormhole: dream I // dream II
morning wormhole: make your rickety / constructs strong with / unbending grids / of attention and wide- / open grates of let
waiting wormhole: I keep / waiting to be discovered and get lost in anticipation

 

dream I // dream II

Tags

2014, 3*, arrival, blue, experience, explanation, giving, hill, identity, looking, people, poem, reflection, retirement, school, tarmac, teaching, time, town, waking, windows

          dream I

    I had to get to school
    from the college halls
    in a town I didn’t know
    or what I was doing there

    I was already late
    but making my way
    past blue window reflections
    on honeycomb tarmac

    I realised I was going the
    wrong way up a hill people looking
    at me in my teacher’s clothes they
    knew the school is not here

    I am in an area I do not know
    so I go back down the hill
    trying to show that I know
    what I am doing I can see

    the whole town spread out
    like a city the different areas
    the school is there somewhere
    and I need to get myself there

and yet woken up now I’m not so sure I do

          dream II

    my chance to teach
    I explain everything

with little clever phrases like poems
    but each time

    I have to explain yet further
    taking hours, not

    holding them I gave of my
    of my own experience but it wasn’t

    theirs, they started leaving
    before I could conclude

retired now I’m not sure I ever arrived

 

 

 

^{————w}(O)rmholes_________________________________|—–

blue wormhole: pass and / fro
giving wormhole: six paramitas
identity wormhole: I keep / waiting to be discovered and get lost in anticipation
looking wormhole: over-pink cagoule
people wormhole: memorial
retirement wormhole: Virginia
school wormhole: step
teaching wormhole: make your rickety / constructs strong with / unbending grids / of attention and wide- / open grates of let
time wormhole: tragic and archival
windows wormhole: windows // and balconies

 

‘let them slide off …’

Tags

2013, 3*, fog, groundlessness, humour, managerialism, measure, survival, teaching

                let them slide off
                let them shed
                the weights and the measures

                let there be levity
                redundant and quiet
                in groundless fog and cloud

 

 

 

^{————w}(O)rmholes_________________________________|—–

fog wormhole: thick thick fog
groundlessness wormhole: beepbeep
managerialism wormhole: just saying, is all VIII: keeping up toxic appearences
teaching wormhole: step

 

‘avenue of wraggled gorse tops …’

Tags

'scape, 2013, 3*, Ashdown Forest, avenue, clouds, gorse, grey, horizon, silhouette, walking

 

                                   avenue of wraggled gorse tops
                silhouetted before grey-serried ranks of cloud
                     stood to attention on the horizon

 

 

 

^{————w}(O)rmholes_________________________________|—–

Ashdown Forest wormhole: ssreet chak-chak
clouds wormhole: morning sun
grey & walking wormhole: landscape of cloud over London / with differing depths of grey
horizon wormhole: south horizon
silhouette wormhole: garden

 

wasted –

Tags

2013, 3*, being, doing, living, lost, sea, waste, waves

                                day spent
                                doing my
                                own thing
                day spent doing things for others, both

                                wasted –
                                I was not
                                there –
                lost in the shallows of the sea along the flat shoreline

 

 

 

^{————w}(O)rmholes_________________________________|—–

being wormhole: nothing significant
doing wormhole: Salisbury Cathedral // suspended in everything
living wormhole: in the / Citadel / Park / a leaf / new / ly fell
sea wormhole: chartless …
waves wormhole: the bench

 

mother and daughter

Tags

2013, 3*, Croydon, daughter, London Bridge, morning, mother, phone, portrait, rhetorical interrogative, sing song, speech, talking, train, Uckfield-London line

                sing song announcement contributing conversation
                in timbre of mother and daughter on the train from

                London Bridge to East Croydon, ‘my battery’s almost
                ran out and … I only charged it up this morninn,’ ‘what

                does that mean,’ asked rhetorical-implicitly, ‘it means,
                I can’t send any more e-mails,’ sure of the right answer

 

 

 

^{————w}(O)rmholes_________________________________|—–

daughter wormhole: to allow / passage
morning wormhole: 1968
mother wormhole: The Boats of Vallisneria by Michael J Redford – Follow Your Nose
speech wormhole: prospect
talking wormhole: singsong chant
train wormhole: gone black
Uckfield-London line wormhole: Hurst Green

 

time travel

Tags

2013, 3*, chimney stacks, London, looking, shops, the Shard, time

time travel

looking
past the lone chimney stack with
preserved lightning strip
over the shop
under the
arches
before the
Shard

 

 

 

^{————w}(O)rmholes_________________________________|—–

London wormhole: south horizon
looking wormhole: to allow / passage
shops wormhole: that comicbookshop … // … in dreams
time wormhole: where it has taken birth / may it not decrease …

 

seen but not heard

Tags

2013, 3*, career, children, creation, identity, managerialism, sidelined, teaching, thought

                                seen but not heard

                I expected to participate and share
                in the discussion and very endeavour
                to which I had offered my thought and creation

                not side-lined off somewhere
                out of the way of the grown-ups
                and told I was valued only if I whinged enough

 

 

 

^{————w}(O)rmholes_________________________________|—–

career & identity & managerialism wormhole: retirement
thought wormhole: comfy

 

No

Tags

2016, 3*, allegory, creativity, earth, exhaustion, image, music, parallel, talking to myself, writing

                No

                it’s not all about finding the allegory
                or sustaining the image that parallels
                whatever the song I am listening to

                it’s letting the song lodge its effect in me
                like earth, and writing that; this omnipotent
                excising something ex nihilo stuff is

                so exhausting and unnecessary …

 

 

 

^{————w}(O)rmholes_________________________________|—–

creativity wormhole: substance
music wormhole: chartless …
talking to myself wormhole: passing below
writing wormhole: that comicbookshop … // … in dreams