poessay XI – piquant love

Tags

2019, 6*, arch, cause and conditionality, compromise, crane, doing, identity, intuition, knowledge, letting go, life, love, not knowing, obscuration, opportunity, others, poessay, scandal, self, shadow, sitting, thought, writing

poessay XI –

                lookitallathisabouttheplace –
                both the obscuration and the opportunity difficult
                either to see or to take:

                                I don’t know what to do –
                                inject into causality
                                project over condition (whatever

                                I’m sure that’s not the way to do) –
                                I can only know what I intuit
                                usually de-spite “I don’t know

                                but will step in line
                                if you let me join the gang”
                                best served unnoticeable

                                but not really
                                me no matter how deep the cover;
                                so back to the hunch –

                                crane reaching from the crumbling arch –
                                written up on giddy foolscap
                                (given half the chance, or notice)

                                but this is not me either
                                just a more clever ‘I don’t know’
                                than all the others who don’t know at all

                                or know by some rote too lazy
                                or compromised to know (what I
                                might know) or those who

                                say they know holding me deficient
                                that I don’t behave as they know
                                (compromised to behold), or then

                                there are those who seem to know
                                despite the prevalence and norm all about
                                from whom I absorb

                                through my very xylem
                                and then heavy-shadow them all about
                                but they don’t know either

                                just more mystically or glamorously so
                                until the scandal;
                                so don’t try to know at all

                                because any of this knowing
                                is just a whorl somewhere
                                within cascading causality

                                making sure my specious self;
                                just let the self go
                this knower, this knower so much better and deeper than anyone else who does not even know what is to be known,                

                                let it all go
                                and sit with the not-knowing,
                                watching all the fluidity with

                                                                                                piquant love

 

 

 

^{————w}(O)rmholes_________________________________|—–

compromise wormhole: looking for the right exit
crane & doing & identity & thought & writing wormhole: travel // when I die
knowledge wormhole: Dulwich College, London, 1871
letting go wormhole: at Kreukenhof
life wormhole: psssssh
love wormhole: The Boats of Vallisneria by Michael J. Redford – The Valley
others wormhole: quietly in my quiet house
shadow wormhole: breakfast
sitting wormhole: – creak —

 

Advertisement

the early morning of the sixties

Tags

1960s, 2013, 20th century, 7*, abandonment, adults, boundary, breakdown, ceiling, childhood, divorce, doors, echo, emergence, floorboards, groundlessness, morning, parent, politics, relationship, scandal, society, Sylvia Plath, talking, walls, war

 

 

 

                                do I remember
                the talk of scandal and abandonment
                that made the adults talk low and aspirated
                                that tipped them
                                              slightly panicked

                to reaffirm the basic boundaries leaving echoes
                                in floorboard creaks
                                and door creaks as they swung open
                                                              to a halt
                fear of the groundlessness beyond the edges
                                the wallnessless
                                the ceilingnessless were they

                talking about the suicide of Sylvia Plath
or the breakdown of relationships in the early morning of the sixties
                                              or my own parents’ breakdown
                                or assassinations
                                or executions
                                or scandals

                or did I just impute that all into a young mind?

 

 

 

^{————w}(O)rmholes_________________________________|—–

20^th century & society wormhole: 20^th century
abandonment wormhole: “write, let’s break / outta here!”
breakdown wormhole: there was a call and far from no response
childhood wormhole: alien / and awkward
divorce wormhole: 2nd November 2011
doors & Sylvia Plath wormhole: swifts test the chasm of sky
echo wormhole: afternoon 290613
emergence wormhole: 1965
floorboards wormhole: 1964
morning wormhole: ‘spilled out of the nurses’ / quarters …’
politics wormhole: Apologia
talking wormhole: you don’t talk to me
walls wormhole: the sun / in a clean / industrial / sky
war wormhole: 32 years