• Bodhisattvacharyavatara
    • Introduction
    • Chapter 1
    • Chapter 2
    • Chapter 3
    • Chapter 4
    • Chapter 5
    • Chapter 6
    • Chapter 7
    • Chapter 8
    • Chapter 9
    • Chapter 10
  • collected works
    • 25th August 1981 – count Up
    • askance From Hell
    • Batman
    • The Boats of Vallisneria by Michael J. Redford
    • Bob 1995-2012
    • Edward Hopper: Poems at an Exhibition
    • David Bowie Movements in Suite Major
    • Eglinton Hill
    • FLOORBOARDS
    • Granada
    • in and out / the Avebury stones / can’t seem to get / a signal …
    • Lapping Reflections [Deep Within Waters]
    • Miller’s Batman
    • mum
    • nan
    • Portsmouth – Southsea
    • Spring Warwick breezes / over Bacharach fieldwork and boroughs with / the occasional shift and chirp of David / in the pastel-long morning of the sixties
    • through the crash
  • index
    • #A-E see!
    • F–K, wha’ th’
    • L-P 33 1/3 rpm
    • Q-T pie
    • U-Z together forever
  • me
  • others
    • William Carlos Williams
  • poemics
  • poeviews
  • teaching matters
  • wormholes

mlewisredford

~ may the Supreme and Precious Jewel Bodhichitta take birth where it has not yet done so …

mlewisredford

Tag Archives: wanting

‘not sure …’

23 Monday Dec 2019

Posted by m lewis redford in poems

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'scape, 2019, 6*, balcony, being, glass, houses, identity, illusion, light, moon, seeing, settee, streetlight, twilight, valley, wanting, writing

        not sure
        I wanted
        the over-
        head light
        on, until

        I noticed
        the grills
        of the bal-
        cony rail
        and the

        streetlights
        down the
        valley (before
        lounge
        lights were

        needed)
and myself
                between the both
        reclined to
        the write on

        the settee
        under a
        double full-
        se moon
        amid glazing

 

still in my friend’s apartment in Totnes towards being evening

 

 

————w(O)rmholes________________________________|—–

being & streetlight wormhole: nowhere / that can be seen
glass wormhole: Puerto del Carmen
identity & writing wormhole: poessay XI – piquant love
light wormhole: riders of the night
moon wormhole: 11/1 by William Carlos Williams
seeing wormhole: breakfast
twilight wormhole: only
valley wormhole: Lapping Reflections [Deep Within Waters] – valley

 

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it’s all about…;

25 Sunday Mar 2018

Posted by m lewis redford in poems

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Tags

2016, 6*, giving, Have, identity, looking, possession, seeing, thinking, wanting

                it’s all about…;

                it’s not looking
                for what I want
                it’s having
                what I see

                it’s not having
                what I want
                it’s giving
                what isn’t mine

                and when I
                think carefully
                about it, nothing
                is really mine

 

 

 

————w(O)rmholes________________________________|—–

Have & identity wormhole: coagulating
looking wormhole: hold them
seeing wormhole: sharpened apex
thinking wormhole: green and / luminant / to behold

 

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when the rain has settled / the dust

12 Friday Jan 2018

Posted by m lewis redford in poems

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2018, 6*, air, attachment, Bodhisattvacharyavatara, feet, holiday, Lanzarote, living, rain, rainbow, sound, study, time, volcano, wanting

                so the lay of the day
                sets differently than ago and

                we have to unpack everything
                and decide where it will go

                before we hear naked feet slamp
                on vinyl floor and tile

                before the rainbow hangs
                a curtain between one volcano

                and the next but one, before the
                notes on the text become

                unnecessary-enough to know
                that combustion happens only when

                I-want-things-to-happen and
                when I-do-not-want-things-to-happen

                as before, that new air
                folds through an apartment only

                when the rain has settled
                the dust

 

 

 

————w(O)rmholes________________________________|—–

air wormhole: Cocktails in 1951
feet wormhole: om muni muni maha muniye soha
holiday wormhole: concordance
living wormhole: Sandwich
rain wormhole: for / the first time
sound wormhole: London refugee march – 120915
study wormhole: looking back over the tack / and jibe of my life I / notice there is / a fetch // after all … / but certainly not / where I had planned / or where I thought / I’d been
time wormhole: is this it // all the time

 

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facing the crime section

10 Monday Jul 2017

Posted by m lewis redford in poems

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Tags

2013, 6*, being, bookshop, finding, notebook, perspective, poem, remembering, wanting, writing

                I’m out
                I’ve remembered my notebook
                I’m sat in the book shop
                (facing the crime section)
                wanting too much to have…
                    …found the lean out|      |from which the
                                or the crevice|      |perspective will…
                                              reveal the poem
                                      to remember where I am enough
                                                                           to find it

 

 

 

————w(O)rmholes________________________________|—–

being wormhole: nevertheless
bookshop wormhole: dream / 221297
writing wormhole: written relief to / creeping anaesthesia / through palimpsest / and crankled page

 

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Quiver of / Tiffany – poewieview #20

22 Tuesday Mar 2016

Posted by m lewis redford in poems, poeviews

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Tags

2016, abundance, atrophy, bitterness, Bowie, city, cross, curtains, decay, defeat, dockside, earth, gods, hatch, horizon, humanity, love, mortality, mountain, opening, pen, piles, plane, portal, privacy, rage, reverse, river, ruler, sphere, step, tears, wanting, waves

                                reverse
                of usual effulgent horizons opening like shallow waves
                                              logarithmically
                                wanting
                fall-to-knees mortality and tears over abundance, equally
                                              untenable
                                              atrophic

                                stepped to the earth
                                from the mountains
                                a god stood like a man

                                down by the docks, by
                                the piles, while a city grew
                                and festered all about

                                the river: hatch and cross,
                                pen and ruler, private
                                and bitter, sphere and

                                plane, all with woven
                                curtain pulled, defeated,
                                across every portal, and

                                no room for Quiver of
                                Tiffany, only a rage that
                                I cannot control, after all

 

through the lonely portals of The Supermen, 1970; Saviour Machine, 1970; Running Gun Blues, 1970

Read the collected movements in David Bowie: Movements in Suite Major

 

 

————w(O)rmholes________________________________|—–

Bowie wormhole: my // shell – poewieview #19
city wormhole: gotcha
curtains wormhole: the art of sit and follow
horizon wormhole: stacked
love wormhole: where the goblins leered – poewieview #14
river wormhole: the silent night of the Batman
tears wormhole: dear clown’s face
waves wormhole: thick thick fog

 

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sit / and move

21 Saturday Nov 2015

Posted by m lewis redford in poems

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2013, being, continuing, emptiness, experience, freedom, letting go, nothing, posture, practice, sitting, travelling, wanting

 

 

 

                                when sitting I sit
                                a posture and dwell …

                                I am travelling now
                                what do I experience …?

                                in both I miss
                                the empty centre

                                of nothing happening
                                but wanting makes it so …

                                I suppose I’ll just keep on
                                sitting and moving

                                until I stop or maybe
                                better

                                stop wanting that I can sit
                                and move more freely

 

 

 

————w(O)rmholes________________________________|—–

being & letting go wormhole: left alone
emptiness & practice & sitting wormhole: the practice
posture wormhole: training the mind
travelling wormhole: 50 mph

 

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… Mark; remember …

"... the impulse to keep to yourself what you have learned is not only shameful; it is destructive. Anything you do not give freely and abundantly becomes lost to you. You open your safe to find ashes." ~ Annie Dillard

pages coagulating like yogurt

  • Bodhisattvacharyavatara
    • Chapter 1
    • Chapter 10
    • Chapter 2
    • Chapter 3
    • Chapter 4
    • Chapter 5
    • Chapter 6
    • Chapter 7
    • Chapter 8
    • Chapter 9
    • Introduction
  • collected works
    • 25th August 1981 – count Up
    • askance From Hell
    • Batman
    • Bob 1995-2012
    • David Bowie Movements in Suite Major
    • Edward Hopper: Poems at an Exhibition
    • Eglinton Hill
    • FLOORBOARDS
    • Granada
    • in and out / the Avebury stones / can’t seem to get / a signal …
    • Lapping Reflections [Deep Within Waters]
    • Miller’s Batman
    • mum
    • nan
    • Portsmouth – Southsea
    • Spring Warwick breezes / over Bacharach fieldwork and boroughs with / the occasional shift and chirp of David / in the pastel-long morning of the sixties
    • The Boats of Vallisneria by Michael J. Redford
    • through the crash
  • index
    • #A-E see!
    • F–K, wha’ th’
    • L-P 33 1/3 rpm
    • Q-T pie
    • U-Z together forever
  • me
  • others
  • poemics
  • poeviews
  • teaching matters
  • William Carlos Williams
  • wormholes

recent leaks …

  • “…and may the great elements…”
  • paisley // implicitly
  • this pocketed being
  • the inevitable tock // when we close our eyes
  • time
  • the simple prayer // the tattered poem // the bitter lament
  • taking birth
  • mirror
  • long / road
  • ‘in my car I pass…’

Uncanny Tops

  • me
  • Moebius strip
  • YOUNG WOMAN AT A WINDOW by William Carlos Williams
  • 'in my car I pass...'
  • 'the practice ...'
  • 'I can write ...'
  • like butterflies on / buddleia
  • meanwhile
  • 'hello old friend ...'
  • under the blue and blue sky

category sky

announcements awards embroidery poems poeviews reflectionary teaching

tag skyline

'scape 2* 3* 4* 5* 6* 7* 8* 20th century 1967 1979 1980 2008 2009 2010 2011 2012 2013 2014 2015 2016 2017 2018 2019 acceptance afternoon air Allen Ginsberg anxiety architecture arm in arm attention awareness Batman beach beauty bedroom being birds birdsong black blue Bodhisattvacharyavatara books Bowie branches breakdown breathing breeze brown Buddha buildings career Carol cars change child childhood children city clouds coffee shop colour combe end comics communication compassion compromise crane creativity curtains dancing dark death distraction divorce doing doors dream Dr Strange earth echo Edward Hopper Eglinton Hill emergence emptiness evening eyes faces family father feet field floorboards garden Genesta Road girl giving glass gold grass green grey growth haiku hair hands Have hedge hill hills history holiday hope horizon house houses identity kitchen leaf leaves lemon letting go life lifetimes light lime listening living London looking lost love management managerialism mauve meaning mind mist moon morning mother mouth movement Mum muse music night notice open openness orange others park passing pavement people performance management pink Plumstead poetry pointlessness politics portrait posture power practice professionalism purple purpose quiet rain reaching reading realisation reality red requires chewing river roads roof rooftops samsara sea searching seeing settling shadow shops silence silhouette silver sitting sky skyline sleep smell smile snow society sound space speech step stone streetlight streets sun sunlight superhero table talking talking to myself teaching teaching craft Thames thinking thought time train travelling trees true nature university voices walking walls water waves white William Carlos Williams wind windows wood Woolwich words work world writing years yellow zazen

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